I've always been a klutz, but pregnancy has taken it to an entirely new level. Last week, I spilled a big glass of water on the table, and thus, on Ben's iPad (luckily, all was fine, but it wasn't appreciated or well-received).
This past weekend, when headed to the beach, I accidentally hit someone's car with our beach umbrella while walking through the parking lot (the car was also fine). At a cookout on Sunday, I dropped a berry on Ben's jeans, leaving a stain (another move Ben didn't appreciate). And then yesterday morning at 6:30 am, I completed my biggest feat yet: I spilled tea on my laptop keyboard. One of my worst nightmares come true! Needless to say, my level of anxiety skyrocketed immediately. I performed all of the tricks--upside down drying in front of a fan, shutting it down and praying/ignoring it while hoping all would miraculously be fine, calling Apple for tips and tricks for healing a wet MacBook, but alas, as the liquid seeped deeper and deeper into the recesses of the computer, I knew it was a lost cause. My laptop is now at a local Mac specialist trying to be resuscitated. Work-wise, I might as well be rendered useless. We have a back-up desktop that I can use for basic functions like email and posting this blog post, but when it comes to all of my client and design work, I've been forced to a standstill. As I wait for an estimate for the repair, which could take 2-4 days (when I heard these words, my heart sank! You mean 2-4 hours, right!?), I am doing my best to practice non-attachment, but wow, is that a hard yama to cultivate--especially when it comes to technology. I keep telling myself that in the grand scheme of things, it's fine: I'm fine, my baby is fine, my family is fine, my business is fine--this is just a tiny blip on the productivity radar, and even if I do end up having to replace the laptop (an expense I'd rather not deal with while in baby prep mode), my files are all backed up and all will be totally fine. So why is it so upsetting? Why does it feel like such a huge setback? I think it's because I value productivity, a quick turnaround time, and non-stop work SO much. And because my self worth can get so wrapped up in my work when I'm not mindful. And of course, because I was counting on this week to be a super productive one, especially after taking the long weekend off and just relaxing (and therefore, letting the work pile up). So maybe this is just the universe's way of preparing me for maternity leave--for that time when I am not productive AT ALL (business/work-wise) and not working becomes my new normal for a while. Or maybe it's just another chance for me to slow down...and I'm going to keep getting hit over the head with life forcing me to slow down until I'm just napping all day long ;) Either way, I'm taking this as a sign that I need to work on letting go of my need to constantly produce...and as a reminder that in my work-world, [almost] nothing is urgent. This is always an important lesson to come back to, even if it doesn't always feel that way when you're in the thick of things. {But also, if the technician could go ahead and hurry up with fixing my laptop--who is pictured above in all of her functioning glory in Costa Rica back in 2015-- that would be greeeeeaaatttt...} How have you been challenged to let go of your attachments lately? Is this yama as hard for you as it is for me? It's one of my biggest struggles! But I'm going to keep working with it and hope you'll join me in these efforts if you, too, are challenged by this concept... Comments are closed.
|
HELLO!I'm Mary Catherine, a Cape Cod-based yoga teacher, painter, designer, writer, mom, and list-maker extraordinaire. My goal is to inspire you to start living a more creative, simple, joyful, + purposeful life.
{Learn more + read my story}
|