Motherhood Monthly: My 5 Favorite Things About Being a Mom

Now that I've been a mom for a little over 8 months, I feel like I'm finally able to talk about it with some sort of perspective. Not a ton--I'm no expert or anything--but with a bit more perspective than I had a few months ago.

Because for a while I was just in it. I mean, IN IT. Things were hard and I wasn't able to see past my last few hours of sleep (or lack thereof); I was overwhelmed, overworked, overextended, and overtired. But now, things are settling down. That doesn't mean that they're easy, but they're easier than they were, and that has made all of the difference.  
So, while I've tried to be super honest about the challenges of being a mom here on the blog (see this post addressed to all moms, this post about child care, this post about our sleep challenges, and this post about my birth experience), I hope that I haven't come across as too negative, and that I've made it clear that I also think being a mom is absolutely amazing (and that I wouldn't trade it for anything). 

But just in case I haven't made this clear, I thought I'd use this month's "Motherhood Monthly" to share 5 of the reasons that I think being a mom is the best. Quick caveat here: I'm not going to include the the all-encompassing, totally-overpowering love that motherhood has brought into my life on this list, because I feel like that love is a given and enough moms have already gushed about that part of the experience. 

Thus, here are some of the unexpected things that I love most about being a mom...
 
1. The kisses. You guys, Charlie Mae just learned how to give us kisses when we ask her the question, "Can I have a smooch?" They aren't traditional kisses *quite* yet, but they're kisses, nonetheless. I don't think I've ever melted the way that I do every time she leans in for a kiss with her little lips parted. It SLAYS me. 

2. The new sense of purpose it's given me. I know this sounds trite, but here's what I mean by this: before having Charlie Mae, I thought I knew what was important to me and what defined me as a person. While I still value the things that I valued before, Charlie Mae has totally shifted my perspective. I care less about work (although I still care about it, of course), I care less about how I look to others (although again, I still care), and I care less about letting people down than I did before (see my recent post about my retreat). In my case, I think that my caring less about these things is actually a positive change because I cared too much before. Motherhood has given me a clearer sense of purpose that has allowed me to let go of a lot of my old worries and refocus my energy.

3. How fun it is! And how it has forced me to work less and play more. I didn't know how fun being a mom would be! I have this little sidekick who is with me all the time and while yes, that can be hard, it's also really fun because she's funny, enjoyable to be around, makes me smile, and forces me to just hang out in a way that I've always struggled to do. She makes me laugh out loud multiple times per day, she gets us doing things we wouldn't make time for otherwise (Going to the park! Watching baby animals! Lounging in the hammock!), and she is just a fun gal. What can I say? I like hanging with my boo ;) 

4. The deeper connection it's created between me and Ben. I'd heard people say that having a baby brings you closer to your partner, but I didn't understand what they meant until Charlie Mae came along. All of the sudden we have this new priority in common--the most important thing in both of our lives is our daughter, and sharing that feeling has been really, really wonderful. [That's not to say that having a baby hasn't also brought up lots of new relationship issues, because it has!]

5. The challenge. I've always liked a good challenge, and so far, having a baby is the biggest one I've ever come up against. But when it's not driving me to tears (because as I've said before, it definitely has!), the challenge feels really good. Because you know what's so great about a good challenge? It feels amazing when you figure something out, or when something clicks, or when that challenge teaches you something new about yourself or the world. And wouldn't you know it, all of that has happened since becoming a mom. I've learned a lot about myself, I've learned a lot about other people, and I've learned a lot about my daughter. Even though it often has nothing to do with me, I feel a real sense of accomplishment when she learns something new or we get through a challenging time together as a family. 

So yeah, as you can probably tell, despite all of the challenges, I still think being a mom is the best. And what I hope you get from the 5 points above (and the multiple blog posts about the challenges of this role) is this: that in my experience, being a parent is all of the emotions, all of the time, all at once.

It's the best and the worst. It's the most beautiful and the most ugly. It brings out the most loving parts of your personality and at times, the darker parts, too. It makes you laugh and cry (sometimes at the same time). It softens you in some ways and hardens you in others. It fills you with love until you think you're going to burst. It's everything all at once and it's pretty freaking magical--despite the excess of bodily functions, tears, frustrations, feelings of ineptitude, and sleepless nights.

​See? It's everything.